A Surprising Gift--Draft One
A Surprising Gift--Draft One
Tom is a stupid boy. He plays the computer game all the time and never does the homework so his often gets a failing grade on the exam. But one day, when he got home, he found that his father, which held a report card in his hand, was super upset. And then his father asked him to stand next to him so that he interrogated him something. Because he got a great grades in the final exam, Tom's father thought that he was cheated in the exam. However, he told his father that he got good grades by studing hard. He did that due to give him a surprise on the Father's Day. Finally, Tom's father laughed.
posted by 美萱 at 2:39 AM
7 Comments:
"studing" should write "studying".
"a great grades " You can choose writing "a great grade" or "great grades".
"his father, which" because "his father", "which" should change to "who".
"He plays the computer game all the time and never does the homework so his often gets a failing grade on the exam." "his" should change into "he",and between "homework" and "so" should add ",".
"And then" his father should add ","
* He plays the computer game* should change to * He plays the computer games*
I think Tom is not a stupid boy because he can get great grades.
His father might be very suprised.
"which held a report card in his hand"You should change to "...in his hands."
Your story is funny.
What a sweet boy it is!
Everything is good for something!
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